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Tuesday, February 9, 2010, 8:49 PM
wheee.
oh yay this feels good. cutting myself off.it's good for everyone.
emoynk~
so cute aha. i feel a bit selfish. i'm like enjoying myself here and making people suffer.
never give up! YAYYYY. i am a happy person.
i think it's over between me and kpop.
existence... i just need to confirm it every now and then x) if it's still there in the first place :D
huh? you? me? does that mean it's the end.
holy mother. rashes again. really old liao. back ache muscle ache head ache all day. stupid back ache from wu-ing at boarding school plus it was so short some more. lol it came with a bruise too.
Sunday, February 7, 2010, 6:53 PM
insanity.
i feel stupid. filled in the stupid $$ form then realised that i could have just grouped everything and whatever. wa lao, nevermind i write already might as well submit. i listed out every single thing omg T_Tok i officially dislike doing this. i shall change my way of doing it haha. ok from now on, nobody gets money until the money comes.
and junsu is FINALLY COMING AHHHHHH but why am i not that happy. maybe 'cause he's not coming as dbsk boo. i think i am slowly losing interest in korean men. this is bad. wait maybe this is a good thing!
what was that. i feel so distracted now again. crap ARGH. frustrations. i thought things became better. the worst thing is idk if it's still there. omg why am i so affected. screw this. nothing links. i should keep the distance. GRR.(i guess you can't always be there... so maybe it's just me T_T. i wish you knew...)
rewind time~ rewind rewind rewind. 2 years! 2 years is enough.
i need to decide: to stop or not. stop? not? i don't know. different frequencies? stop.
luckily i don't have much to do today. i can't get anything done now. *faints* this feeling sucks!
Saturday, February 6, 2010, 4:57 PM
#400
life sucks and then you die.not fair not fair not fair not fair.
i don't care about you and what you think. 내가 그렇게 렇게 만만하니?! 너 완전 짜증나 너 하나밖에 난 몰랐잖아 언젠간 똑같이 당해. (lol from man man ha ni) -.- this seriously sucks.
wtf i keep telling myself that i don't care but think i still do -.- i think the part up there got misunderstood. crap, i should have made things clearer.
and wth what is happening to EVERYTHING. the only thing that isn't so screwed up yet is... oddly enough, school -.- lol. everything (okay maybe there is an exception) that involves emotions or interpersonal relationships is SCREWED.
this is scary. i hate restrictions. i wanna have fun and be spastic like i do with err, clarissa or something heh. i get a heart attack everytime stupid msn pops a window out from nowhere and tells me someone says something. i feel stupid. babo~
overwhelmed by idkwhat. today is a nice day to emo haha. i think my virtual self and myself in real life are like... different.
i'm sick and i'm tired. (lol brickwall! the demo version of Survivor.)
when there is @#!?, i can't get anything done and when there isn't @#!?, i think about @#!?. well done.
ok haha i think my brain works much better at midnight because it's so much quieter. everything. and there are lesser distractions 'cause no one is online. also, since it's saturday night, sort of, i don't feel rushed haha. and i was listening to some nice thingy so i feel damn calm now. i don't even remember how i felt just now. i look at what i write and wonder why i was so grumpy.
i wish i could hide behind a screen forever. i hate the real world. actually, just the pace of it... too fast for me.
that invisible barrier...
Wednesday, February 3, 2010, 7:45 PM
irritated.
i just realised i accidentally locked my blog when i was showing yip the readers list -.-stupid problems coming from everywhere. no one understands. but life is still good because i am alive and eating.
i hate it when people question me about things i don't want to answer.
oh look, horoscope~
what? who? me? nothing. deal with it.
hah i went and deleted a lot of stuff. i knew it. life has caught up. i shall not be bothered with it for awhile haha until everything settles down and yea. wait for the weekends to come. (seriously, i no longer understand anything.)
3:54 PM
yip the crazy is currently beside me.
HI YIP -.-your mother my mother. stop reading my blog (oi!).
life sucks and then you die. i want friday to come. no wait, i mean saturday. then can slack, be an idiot and do lame stuff.
Tuesday, February 2, 2010, 9:08 PM
can you sense my sarcasm.
ct x 2, shooting, npap, treasurer position all gone down the drain. whoosh~ yay :Dwell i certainly don't regret ct'08 and shooting. and i like my position as treasurer. but, ok nevermind.
Monday, February 1, 2010, 9:03 PM
jfoiejoirj.
life is unfair. it sucks to be on the lousy side. but this is life~ -.-i feel like i cannot enjoy anything else in life anymore haha. i hate the feeling of having good things end anyway. so when good things happen, i'll just think of it ending and blah. i never live in the present -.-
i hope that science advances to a point where you can change your looks easily though haha. that would be creepy. but whatever lah. maybe they could limit the change. like, you can't be too different from what your original self. haha. i want to have the ability to change what i imagine into reality heh. or if i want it badly enough, it will happen.
talking about imagination... haha i felt like saying something but then i cannot bring myself to say it so shall not say :D
lalalala.
looking at my archives, i used to be so lame and weird but i think i was happier. or at least not so self-conscious. haha 缓缓飘落的枫叶像思念~ and the stuff that i worried about was all very trivial but i took pride in a lot of trivial things. the things we worry about as we get older are really different man...
Sunday, January 31, 2010, 5:06 PM
it's a fine line.
rah. i just realised i ate a lot today. let's see. chocolate croissant, pizza, prata, spaghetti, porridge, apple pie, black glutinous rice thingy. the bad thing is that i am still hungry -.-but really got nothing to eat already. i wanted to do the 报章 thing but i think i accidentally left it in school. win. how to copy text from protected pdf files! gah.
my sitemeter is screwed D:
고마워 x)
내 인생에 너가 필요해. The Gift by jim brickman perfectly expresses how i am feeling right now. hee. ok fine, the context might be different but whatever.
aqua regia is cool. but aero gel will always be cooler. gold is cute. i need to stop reading wikipedia articles.
Saturday, January 30, 2010, 5:13 PM
back at one.
i like the first picture haha. look: five isn't the end. i'm just starting back at one.
watched shinee's hello baby and a few more episodes of idol maknae rebellion. i love key and G.O.
i just realised i touched the cover of the tomyam thingy with the fingers i rubbed my eyes with -.- no wonder it's stinging. smart.
hee. the bad thing about blogs is that it's there for the world to see. the good thing about blogs is that it's there for the world to see.
Friday, January 29, 2010, 9:28 PM
bored.
today was kinda -.- lol.lol and erm. COMPANY PRESENTS (!) hinthint. never get company presents from younger people before. (i hope they don't actually give us lightbulbs -.-)
later we pop.
wow. chicken adrenal gland! how to get -.-
since i am bored. i shall list down some fun facts:
- i have dislocated my left elbow before :D (痛死人) from heelies -.- couldn't play monkey bars for like an entire year after.
- i have like 7 stitches on forehead, above my left eye whoo. thanks to tripping over my father's leg and hitting the sofa leg.
- my left eye got single eyelid, right eye double.
cannot think of any more already. but i've always wanted a fracture. somewhere where it wouldn't be too serious lah. i don't wanna fracture my head or something. scary.
Thursday, January 28, 2010, 9:30 PM
balloonz.
curiosity kills the cat~i hope more people are curious 'cause my house there too many cats. so gross. and the cats gave birth to more cats -.-
i love living in my fantasy world. because everything in there is like, what i want. i hope the stuff i imagine becomes reality leh. boo, not possible.
wahahaha. killick's hitch, we meet again! and this time
i wonder where i got all the ideas from last time haha. if they got 4th component this time, i don't think i can come up with anything already.
snsd's album, or at least the songs i've heard so far, sound like they should be sung by f(x) lah. except i can't imagine amber singing gayly.
in sec 1 i looked so impish and spastic omg -.-
that was sec 2 though lol. we were cute -.-
Wednesday, January 27, 2010, 9:54 PM
nothing.
haha nothing much to blog about already.my prediction was correct lah. oh well, what's the worst that can possibly happen~ i shall prepare myself for it first haha. i've been disappointed enough times to know that i shouldn't get my hopes up.
lalalala i finally got the code for archives thanks to esther lol. couldn't be bothered previously. ai yo blogging is pointless i should stop blogging. it doesn't help at all lol. not emo also can make it sound like it's emo one.
the only thing about blogs is sharing stuff, i think. like quotes and random stuff lol. and well, lame stuff. but that isn't really relevant anymore i guess.
yesterday was a nice day. why can't today be an equally nice day huh. huh!! not that i really mind though haha. time passes so fast.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010, 8:41 PM
knockdown.
life is not about the breaths we take, but about the moments that take our breath away.i shall keep that in my mind. and yay today was a relatively nice day. 9 mins 55 secs! and it was almost perfect. plus we were walking around and talking about jaejoong's birthday while tying lashings -.- and no sharlene + lai jia hui coming in to help some more. lalala. need to buy special twine!
and i seriously admire jessica watson. even though she has been my idol ever since i found out about her but haha. i wish i could have as much courage as her though. will work on it! hee. and soldiers are really cool people too.
people nowadays are like... really lousy and uncool. life shouldn't be like that man.
(the following 2 paragraphs are filled with nonsense. please don't read unless you are REALLY BORED.)
and i just read con's blog lol. the going to ikea post very lame -.- BUT NP ROOM WILL SOON HAVE NICE STUFF WAHAHAHA. not like it doesn't already but yea. it's like Huge Improvement from last time. thanks to 44 NCOs who have nothing better to do during acts. seriously, cleaning the fans with poles tied together using round lash while wearing surgical masks (-.-), converting rifle rack into shoe rack (-.- -.-), dragging the table from NP room all the way to guard house there (!!), clearing out and re-organizing almost everything in NP room. oh man. life is good when you have a nice NP room~ heh, and the tan yan ni who decorated the radio omg -.- antenna covered with aluminium foil with pomz at the top?! and the speakers are like covered in felt, casette thingy covered in ice cream sticks. win already.
pink feather duster :D nice cheap clock which i hope to vandalise, sucker hooks, curtains made from flags, tatami mats, 4 cushions. WIN WIN WIN!!
oddly enough, i am in a good mood today. lalala.
yip, if you ever see this, you need help! wig too.
i keep imagining weird situations in my head haha. i personally like doing that a lot and umm, it makes me happy. but there are some things that will never happen in real life. boo.
sec 4 life is nicer than sec 3, for some weird reason. make 'cause i just keep zoning out and i don't really care about things anymore lol. oh well.
this post is really long and weird but it's the way my brain works so umm. yeah.
i feel damn random haha. and sandytan wants us to get a chicken's adrenal gland. i don't know how that is going to happen -.- buy a chicken and dig out it's insides.
AHH I FORGOT IT WAS JAEJOONG'S BIRTHDAY AGAIN.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JAEJOONG! hahahaha. so old already. i wanted to post 3 gifs but then they are not uploading so forget it. lalala.
lame si le -.-
Monday, January 25, 2010, 7:33 PM
hopeless.
i was gonna mention how there was a visit to my blog at 5am in the morning, then i realised it was just me -.-waow. life is scary and unpredictable. sheesh. after rethinking things, i realised i don't really wanna die? 'cause there are some people and things that i will miss. actually i shouldn't be talking about these kind of things now.
everything is ruined. everything. no one will know what i'm talking about here.
and sheesh today was a bad day, in many ways. actually i don't see myself having any good days ever again. screw it.
i am a super selfish person sometimes. i don't like sharing. or maybe not until it's necessary.
and all sad people in the world, cheer up :D i wish i could make people happy. i used to be able to, unknowingly, because i was a happy soul myself. then now... i don't know. i feel very 心痛 whenever i see people i care about being sad and yet i can't do anything. i wouldn't mind existing just to make people happy.
argh second class tomorrow. i wish i went for the first session. life sucks and then you die.
never and forever are two very scary words for me. i hope i will never have to deal with these.
omg i am suddenly scared of scary things again. the 5 letter word that starts with G and all that. eeyer D: i don't like sleeping alone. i want to sleep with someone but there is no one to sleep with. haha that sounds wrong -.- but yea... i should like hire people to sleep with me. i like camps and chalet 'cause got people to sleep with.
5:32 AM
):::
i feel depressed and i dunno why.there are 3 possible reasons, all of which i will not list here. sigh. i just have to say, obsessed manxz. seriously. bleah. and i am scared. somehow i wish all these didn't happen. but at the same time i am happy that it did.
Sunday, January 24, 2010, 9:26 PM
bloo.
waiting.lol. today was a crappy day. actually the last time a day wasn't crappy was like 3 days ago. some things just make my day haha. and i think i am addicted -.-
when there isn't ... stuff, i will feel sad and stuff like that. this is bad. it's like a drug!
and actually omg, so direct haha. lalala i am hoping for something to happen. anything. ai yo i need to curb my addiction. BOO. and the bad thing is maybe it's just me. the good thing is it might not be just me. heh.
and i can't understand everything. life sucks when i can't understand something.
죽어도 못보내. i feel depressed hai. it must be the side effects or something. and there is nothing to talk about. sucks ): am i a nuisance?
8:31 AM
tree of souls.
grah. i have a bloody huge headache now and i just woke up and i dunno why i am having a headache.bleah. and PL, be strong! we are all here for yoo.
oh crap. i just realised what i got myself into. freak what was i doing.
i wish i was an avatar or something. but that is escaping from reality.
screw you, stop muttering crap and being annoying by venting your anger out on stupid things. i don't care anymore. i hate your way of doing things. if it's a problem then go settle it yourself instead of trying to make us do stupid things for your own satisfaction. it's a problem between you guys, not me. i wish i was never born. nothing in this world right now is worth living for. or at least nothing within reach. i could seriously give up everything that i have right now and live a new life. (on second thought, maybe not) i feel like i'm done with life manxzxz. [inserts swear word]
i am amazed at how i can talk about such $@*(#*%& issues in such a light hearted way. [inserts more swear words]